Bryan W. Alaspa 1Finding that inner Grinch
December 17th 2009 14:22
A lot of people accuse me of being a Grinch or a Scrooge when it comes to Christmas. I tend to disagree. I just have a more practical approach to the holiday. Look, I can get just as warm-hearted and caught up in the madness as much as anyone. I just don’t think you need to take the whole thing as seriously and you certainly don’t need to decorate as much.
There is someone who lives across the street from me who has gone overboard on the inflatable people. We have a snowman that lights up. We have Santa who is also lighted but also, inexplicably, spinning a present in one of his hands. I hope Santa handles my presents much more carefully than he seems to be handling the ones in his hand across the street from me. I think there are igloos and penguins and stuff too, but quite frankly, they are so cheesy and gaudy I try to lower my head and not look at them too much.
I know people who start decorating as soon as October hits. They start crawling across their rooftops to lay line after line of Christmas lights. Those lights go up and down and over the roof and then along the gutters and the entire outline of their house. Why is this necessary? It seems like a lot of work for a very short return. You end up spending more in electrical bills and then have to take all of the stuff down during months when it is, usually, much colder than when you put the damn things up.
Now, I have a single man’s perspective on Christmas. I live alone, with only my dog for company. I keep the blinds facing the busy street I live on closed. There is little point in me putting up a tree or decorations. I don’t have a Christmas party and, generally speaking, don’t have a lot of people over. My dog wants to kill them if they do come over anyway, and that makes socializing awkward. So, who would I be putting decorations up for? Myself? No thanks. That is a lot of work for no real reward. I can get my Christmas fix by walking outside or visiting my parents. I don’t need lights up in my living room to entertain myself and my dog.
I am also amused by people who get up early the day after Thanksgiving to Christmas shop. There is a word I use for these people and the word I like to use is INSANE. Why would you do that when you can wait a few weeks, shop during a week day, or shop from the comfort of your own home using your computer? I tend to make one night of shopping and I do that at a bookstore and then I go home and sit in my decoration-less apartment and watch A Christmas Story.
See, that, to me, is what Christmas is. Christmas is spending time with your family and enjoying the fact that you are all still around and able to celebrate and still enjoy each other’s company. There nothing better than watching my niece open her presents. That is what it’s about, the next generation and the kids, not us grownups trying to cling to our youth just a little bit longer. Also, watching A Christmas Story which, I feel, is the greatest Christmas movie ever created, period, end of story. Sorry Charlie Brown, but Ralphie and his Red Ryder BB gun has got you beat.
So, see, I am not a Grinch, I just think that the pain and torture we put ourselves through for this season is unnecessary. Then again, I am a single man, so take that with a grain of salt.
There is someone who lives across the street from me who has gone overboard on the inflatable people. We have a snowman that lights up. We have Santa who is also lighted but also, inexplicably, spinning a present in one of his hands. I hope Santa handles my presents much more carefully than he seems to be handling the ones in his hand across the street from me. I think there are igloos and penguins and stuff too, but quite frankly, they are so cheesy and gaudy I try to lower my head and not look at them too much.
I know people who start decorating as soon as October hits. They start crawling across their rooftops to lay line after line of Christmas lights. Those lights go up and down and over the roof and then along the gutters and the entire outline of their house. Why is this necessary? It seems like a lot of work for a very short return. You end up spending more in electrical bills and then have to take all of the stuff down during months when it is, usually, much colder than when you put the damn things up.
Now, I have a single man’s perspective on Christmas. I live alone, with only my dog for company. I keep the blinds facing the busy street I live on closed. There is little point in me putting up a tree or decorations. I don’t have a Christmas party and, generally speaking, don’t have a lot of people over. My dog wants to kill them if they do come over anyway, and that makes socializing awkward. So, who would I be putting decorations up for? Myself? No thanks. That is a lot of work for no real reward. I can get my Christmas fix by walking outside or visiting my parents. I don’t need lights up in my living room to entertain myself and my dog.
I am also amused by people who get up early the day after Thanksgiving to Christmas shop. There is a word I use for these people and the word I like to use is INSANE. Why would you do that when you can wait a few weeks, shop during a week day, or shop from the comfort of your own home using your computer? I tend to make one night of shopping and I do that at a bookstore and then I go home and sit in my decoration-less apartment and watch A Christmas Story.
See, that, to me, is what Christmas is. Christmas is spending time with your family and enjoying the fact that you are all still around and able to celebrate and still enjoy each other’s company. There nothing better than watching my niece open her presents. That is what it’s about, the next generation and the kids, not us grownups trying to cling to our youth just a little bit longer. Also, watching A Christmas Story which, I feel, is the greatest Christmas movie ever created, period, end of story. Sorry Charlie Brown, but Ralphie and his Red Ryder BB gun has got you beat.
So, see, I am not a Grinch, I just think that the pain and torture we put ourselves through for this season is unnecessary. Then again, I am a single man, so take that with a grain of salt.
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